In between all the ranting and complaints, did you ever take a minute for being grateful to God for his countless blessings? While wetting yourself in the pouring rain you always know that you have a cozy bed to sleep after, a fireplace to comfort your hands and a colorful dinner set at the table. There are people who dread the rain that we cherish the most. The gruesome notion of pouring leafy roofs, water-drenched bed in the night too cold. 
We should always be thankful to God for all the happiness and comfort that he provided us with even without asking him. In the morning that he gave you another life, at night that you have a blanket to cuddle inside and a roof to protect you from the wild. 

It is happening nowadays that I don’t feel like writing anything, and trust me it’s quite normal, I don’t feel like I need some extra attention or some emotional help. I think all I need is some peaceful time away from work, all alone with myself. We are all humans and nobody can remain energetic and wild all the time. Sometimes no matter how hard we try, we have to let go for the good. It’s 12:12 in the morning and I haven’t slept a wink because I was too busy thinking about what to write. I believe in tangled musings and late-night contemplations, yet sometimes all we can feel is a hollowness inside. A hollowness that ceases our mind for a while causing a state of partial paranoia. It doesn’t mean that you are necessarily sad, or something is wrong. It can be a consequence of preoccupation of mind in too many areas, anxiety, curiosity, daydreaming, insomnia, overwhelming, excess of happiness and whatnot.

As on vacations, I have applied for internships in different offices and got an interview call from most of them with a very handsome monthly stipend. However, I was not ready for an internship this month so I left the interview calls unattended just to make a decision for my heart once in a while. I have been carrying out the instructions of my parents, teachers, and elders regarding either to do something or not. I went against my heart many times, yet I believe that right now if I can make a choice for myself, why not avail this chance? I am waiting for a much worthy internship right now that will start in August but that means I am free for 15 days again. Right after that, a thought of “university is going to get open soon” comes to my mind which is literally enough to ruin my whole day 😀 Simultaneously, there is a charity school in my vicinity where I teach as a volunteer, I am continuously thinking about joining that school again as well. Also, I am waiting for my driver to arrive so that I can join a very famous media group for my internship as it has already been finalized, just the paperwork is to be done. At the same time, I want to wake up all night watching my favorite series and rise late in the morning. However, I am also worried and guilty that I haven’t submitted my writings to any of the magazines this weekend. I am also worried because I have to go for antiques shopping for my room decor but nobody is up for driving me there. See? How many things are on my mind at the moment? I tried to come up with something really positive for you guys tonight but this is all I came up with. I am sleep deprived and I feel like a drunkard at the moment 😀

Guys, enjoy your life! Be your own boss and live your life in the way YOU WANT and not how OTHERS ARE LIVING. Every day, I see people uploading stories with a very bragging caption of “Internship Diaries” and “Office Work”, but it didn’t make any difference in my life. I can also feel envious and start looking out for internships again, but I won’t. Instead, I feel happy cuddling up with my kittens while others are enjoying their internships, and when my time will come, I will start working while they might be pampering themselves in some spa. Similarly, it might be better for you to bake a bunch of chocolate chip cookies and munch on your grizzly couch while watching Netflix. “Stranger Things” is a very good season just by the way 😀 See, we all are different and so are our needs and lifestyle. We need to accept ourselves in our own way and not in somebody else’s way. If you feel like doing so, Do it! However, if your heart is least interested, Forget it! It’s better to let go sometimes, for the good!

If today is a good day, be thankful and act humble, and if it is not, make yourself believe that tomorrow will be better than today. Every day is a new start and with every new day, we shine brighter than yesterday. All we have to do is believe in ourself and build our own personality. Most of us spend more than half of our life as somebody else’s. While we are busy comparing our lives with that of others, we usually forget that we should be working on creating our own journey, spending our lives just the way we want and feel comfortable in. We forget that we all should have our own personal space, our own identity, our own aura and most importantly our own self. Let’s get depressed everybody because Kylie just uploaded a new IG post where she is spending a spectacular summertime on the island. I think I should end my life because I can’t even afford a coconut on my own right now whilst she has thousands of customized coconuts, each with “Kylie Skin” written on it. I can’t afford to buy a pink and a white pillow while Kylie’s daughter Stormi is snuggling and drooling all the time in a huge pink and white private jet 😀 See, I adore them so much and I think they have a complete right to cherish the most out of what they have and what they can afford. My favorite Youtubers are buying Baja Blast every morning while I can’t even afford to buy a mountain dew 😀 I think I am done with my life haha 😀 See, writing this blog has already made me feel happy and joyful. This is it! Let’s cherish what we can do, and what we can afford rather than always pushing yourself off-limits just to show the world that you are no less. I can make french fries right now because I have a lot of potatoes in the pantry right now. I don’t think Kylie can eat so many chips as me, because fitness duh! 😀 Take care boos. 🙂

Goodnight! 

xoxo <3

Hello beautiful souls!

Okay, so today I am going to share one of my articles that recently got published and is very close to my heart. I would love if you kindly visit the website where it originally got published and show some love, I will really appreciate that! <3 

Show your love at: Obaa by GirlTable  and lets get reading!

Yesterday was a lovely day because I woke up to my two publications in two different magazines. I sipped on my customized hot chocolate in a huge mug with a peppermint stick clinging to its side, as I shared the link with my friends and family. An instant message hit back my phone with the dim buzz which turned into a loud announcement when Siri said: You have a text message from Z.

Eagerly, I opened up my inbox and found one of my class mate’s message saying that her book review also got published a day before in the same magazine as mine. However, she was a bit cringed because they published only a fragment of her review. I found it awkward as well!

To my surprise, I got another message from her instantly saying, “I don’t care if they publish the whole content or a single line out of my passage because this magazine is a flop and anybody can get published in it, getting published in it is no biggie!” The conversation got a bit awkward because I was really content with my achievement, while another person in the same world, by getting published on the same platform was disappointed. Instead of arguing, I congratulated her again and told her that no achievement is big or small, an achievement is meant to be celebrated. So cheers!

I opened up my laptop and started preparing for my Law exam that was to be the following day. While going through the topic of “Human Rights”, something got stuck to my mind and my attention got diverted to the conversation I had a few hours ago with my friend. I realized how she was trying to belittle my efforts and minimizing my contentment and self-confidence. Maybe at that very moment, my mind never perceived anything this way, yet there was a strange awkwardness that my mind failed to apprehend. But in that very moment, that mist of awkwardness faded away and the statue of humiliation emerged from in between.

Actually, when she said that there is nothing special in getting published in this magazine as anybody can get published there if you really want to get published, you should go for some international magazines, my mind was being humiliated. All the content and confidence that I felt in the morning by the single glimpse of my mailbox was gone. Hours ago, I was feeling at cloud nine, while after a few words were uttered, all the satisfaction was gone, all that “I am special” attitude was grounded.

I took out my journal and wrote the “why” of the situation I was put into. The first why that I figured out was “Just because she couldn’t get her complete article published, that is why she said that to me”. Secondly, I figured out the what-if of the situation. I wrote down, “What if her complete article got published in that magazine? Would she still say the same about this magazine?” While these thoughts died as the night passed away.

A few weeks after, I saw her WhatsApp story that proudly displayed the link of her song review that got published in the same magazine she was bad-mouthing about a week ago. I read her article, and it was amazing and complete this time. Now, I opened my journal again and checked that what-if condition that I concluded that day. All the knots were open now and the clearer picture stood right in front of me. This is the age of survival-of-the-fittest, where we are running a race every day, running with an urge for more and more. Our urge is never-ending, in fact, it had turned into a Hunger-game. A game where we can easily prey upon others’ emotions, their feelings, and their happiness, just to conceal our failure.

Today, I shared the link of my article that recently got published with the title “Dawn of the Ugly Era of Comparisons.” I also shared how beautifully that website embellished the article with my complete Bio at the end, unlike the other magazine who just write down a one-line intro of their authors. Shockingly, I got a text message from Z again. She said that you should aim for more international magazines as it is all that matters. These national magazines don’t matter, their publications are futile and a waste of time. I opened up my journal again and started writing the answer:

Dear Diary,

Everyone in this world is trying their best to contribute a teensy bit in this huge world with an ocean of knowledge. Some of us achieve the brownie points while others remain deprived until the right time. However, we all get paid for whatever contribution we make for the betterment of this world.

Why are people trying to humiliate and belittle the efforts that others are making every day? Maybe what is insignificant for them, might be a mountain for the other. Just because we couldn’t achieve something, instead of struggling for that, why do we wish bad luck for others? No matter which platform you are submitting your writings to, no matter which company you are working with, no matter which internship you are doing to earn money, never let others make you feel bad. We all have a different story, we all have different characters and struggles in our stories, we all have a unique ending. If Cinderella had a happy ending with his prince Charming, doesn’t mean you will have the same ending. Your Prince can turn out to be a racist.

Just keep your ambitions high, start step by step, do something every day that brings you closer to your ultimate goal. Remember, life is full of bumps and plains, a few people can become your inspiration while the rest of the world will only point out the fingers at your work, at your achievements. Don’t let others dim your spark, Just keep going! You are doing just fine.

After I was done with the rant, I closed my journal and wrote this message to Z:

Hey Z, no platform is big or small, no website is good or bad, all you have to do is just believe in yourself and be confident in whatever you do. I don’t care if someone gets his fragment published in “Letter to the Editor” segment of a remote magazine. I will appreciate that as well because no achievement is big or small, the achievement is always confident!

After hitting send button, I clicked my mobile screen off and opened up the laptop to submit one book review to the same magazine, while sending an activism article to one of the international magazines for the second time. I started with writing critiques in a magazine, and am writing for three magazines at the moment, without any approval from anyone. Let your achievements shine bright like the diamonds because they are a reminder that you are growing into something bigger and better.

This article is to remind you guys that whatever you are doing, and whatever struggles you’re going through, just own them confidently, be proud and believe in yourself. You are doing an awesome job by trying to contribute to this vast world somehow! Don’t let anybody take that away from you!

Adios,

xoxo…

Books mirror humans in a way that both carry a different story hidden inside their hearts. Every book has a different plot, different settings and different time span that affect the words written inside. As for humans, time, situations and circumstances are majorly accountable for our doings. 
Each book has a different synopsis that can give us the crux of the story yet the actual mystery cannot be solved until we read the whole work. Similarly, a man cannot be judged by his appearance. Just like books, we all have a different story. However, we never judge the books and appreciate each story alike, but we do judge humans on being different from each other. Just as we appreciate the uniqueness of a book, we should cherish the unique auras of each other.

Life is like a balloon race; unpredictable. Sometimes you feel you’re winning, the other time you find yourself lagging behind. At times you are on the top, the other time you’re down below.
Life is all about turns and twists, it barely goes smooth. We are stuck in this adventure park of life until we are living. Sometimes we try to escape which not only makes us stumble down causing hurt but also snatches away many opportunities and moments of mind-blowing pleasure from us. So as long as you are living, just gear up your seat belts and enjoy the roller coaster ride.

Life is this path and life is that path. Sometimes it is a beautiful path, while most of the times it is otherwise. Life is not a bed of roses and thus requires more courage to live than to die. Living is an instinct, but living a beautiful life is an art, not all artists master. With broken facets, smudged colors and shattered pieces, we paint a bigger picture on the canvas of life. 
Thinking rationally, we should prepare for the worst as we are more prone to finding the difficult path in our life. Chins up, as this path doesn’t hold hardships more than what we can endure. 

Every day is a new day, every morning is a fresh start. To keep the day going, we need to forget what happened in the dark. How many tears of your’s wet the pillow last night, how many screams did your mattress benumb? Every morning, the mighty sky cries the tears of blood while giving birth to the sheer sun, while the world remains fast asleep. Nonetheless, the stains are all gone, and the sky shines vibrant when our clocks tick seven!

Sometimes life gives you lemons, but you don’t know how to make lemonade. All you gotta do then is to just close your eyes, breathe and believe in the power of your inner conscience. We are humans and there is nothing in this world that we cannot do. There is no such force that can dominate or stop us from what we want to be. Every coming moment is a new chance, a new hope and a new day. Whatever happened in the past is not going to affect you in any way until you allow it to do so. Fear and guilt are two constant forces that drag us behind from the race of success. 

Learn to live and success is yours! <3

Every end is the start of something else, every shore lapse in the gateway to a deeper ocean. If one door closes, another surely opens up anywhere for you. The word exit always indicates that there is another opportunity that you should be looking for at the moment. With every loss, we lose the hope not knowing that it is up to us how we find that secret door. The quest for seeking the light is always individual. Either find the door or lose the hope, as long as you are breathing, you have to struggle. Slowly and gradually, every struggle turns into the sweetest success.

Whatever is your’s, it is making its way towards you. At the same time what isn’t for you is getting ready to depart from your life. Why worry so much about what is going to happen when you have so much to take care of today? Why think what might happen to you tomorrow when you have so much to love today?

Everything is happening for a reason, so just live in the moment and cherish every single touch, every single memory, and every single acquaintance till you really can…
Carpe Diem!

I know this is unusual, but today I wanted to share something about myself with you guys. I have been thinking about writing a biography lately yet I didn’t get enough time to write one. Starting off with my family, I am the eldest daughter of my parents and the eldest sister to four beautiful and gorgeous sisters. Being eldest is the most difficult experience in this world, be it a daughter, sister, brother, son, friend, or whatever. I have always heard my friends, who are eldest children of their parents, rant about the strictness, hardships, conflicts and what not and most of the times we were in an agreement.

Frankly speaking, there have been many hardships in my life, even there came a time when I wanted to run away from my own home, my own parents and family. Since my secondary school, I found myself in constant conflicts with my mother for no particular reason. For instance, if she said black, I said white, if I say black, she says otherwise. As I grew up, I observed that our conflicts turned into bigger and intense versions of the old, stupid and foolish ones. Our conflicts grew up to an extent where one day my mother blew up and I can not explain how gruesome the consequences were. 😀

On that very day, my mother and I realized that it isn’t just me and her who are in constant disagreement, it is our ideologies, our mindsets, and our personalities that differ. Despite the fact that we love and respect each other, none of us is right or wrong, it’s just that we are different, and being different isn’t always bad.

I remember many nights when I slept crying, my pillow literally drenched in tears while telling God that I love my mom but due to some reason, we both don’t get along well. I prayed to God for her better health and long life, yet I was never able to hug her or tell her what’s inside my heart, how close I actually feel to her. On the other hand, I know that my mother low key loves me too and takes care of every single wish of mine. I remember that even after the tiniest argument of ours, she used to cook my favorite dish in the dinner and I appreciated. I never remember that we held a grudge or bad feelings for each other ever. Our biggest argument lasts for an hour or so and we are normal again, happier than ever!

The basic motive of sharing this post is to help all the struggling elder children and their parents to understand that this happens in almost every home. If not in yours, maybe in the home next door, but it happens everywhere, with everyone. The relationship of parents and children is the only real passion in this world and there is no purer and genuine emotion than this, to be honest. Every acquaintance, every infatuation is selfish and dependent, yet one’s relationship with parents is eternal, free of bounds and constraints, and selfless. 

One of the major reasons of parent-children conflict is lack of or less respect for each other’s stance. Basically, parents think that they are more learned and experienced than their kids, so what their kids are thinking, and feeling is an illusion or something, so they need to terminate this non-sense. I would never say that parents know less than their kids, of course, they have invested a larger amount of time in this world to get to know things, people and how everything works. They worked hard to bring us into this world, take better care of us and give us all the luxuries we can possibly think of. While doing so much for us, they start expecting so much from us to an extent where they think that their kids don’t have a stance, and only they know what is better for their children. In this process, when parents continuously suppress the voice that is screaming inside the brain of a child, the child tends to become rebellious. This rebellion is then counted as disobedience by the parents, while the child thinks that he hates his parents or that his parents aren’t good enough.

As we grow up, we come to know that literally 99.9/100 times, our parents were right and we were wrong. That age always comes when you turn back to your parents for thorough guidance and an open discussion. I am now entering that age group, and many things are getting clearer to me. Many knots are opening, many mysteries are getting solved. I made many decisions that were not advantageous for me, I chose many things that turned against me. All the conflicts between me and my mom faded away with time. We became more like friends with the passage of time because she started giving importance to my words, my opinions, and my choices. Instead of telling me to “quit”, she gave me ideas to modify, and the reasons to give a second thought to the choices I made. So don’t worry girls and boys! Your parents are just worried about you and that is it. Once they are convinced that their kids can make safe choices and are ready to face this cruel world, they will start giving more weight to your opinions. 

Guys, there is no need to panic, I know the eldest children have to endure so much, they have to give sacrifices and go through so many troubles to open up the gates of comfort and ease for their younger siblings. I remember my dad didn’t allow me to use the internet after 9 at night and used to turn off the router at 9:00 PM sharp. I remember my efforts to extend the curfew, how I endured scoldings and harsh comments of my parents 😀 But those efforts bore the fruit for my younger sisters, now we can use the internet throughout the night, without any disturbance or conflicts. This is the minor most example, there are much more intense examples that I wouldn’t share here, but things got on the track slowly and gradually. Don’t panic, don’t feel lonely and anxious, your parents love you a lot, even more than themselves. Haha! Make sure to love yourself and love your family without any doubts in your mind, because no matter how hard you try, your heart will bleed the same blood as theirs. 

If anything happens again, Just take a deep breath and say:

Adios,

xoxo <3