It is happening nowadays that I don’t feel like writing anything, and trust me it’s quite normal, I don’t feel like I need some extra attention or some emotional help. I think all I need is some peaceful time away from work, all alone with myself. We are all humans and nobody can remain energetic and wild all the time. Sometimes no matter how hard we try, we have to let go for the good. It’s 12:12 in the morning and I haven’t slept a wink because I was too busy thinking about what to write. I believe in tangled musings and late-night contemplations, yet sometimes all we can feel is a hollowness inside. A hollowness that ceases our mind for a while causing a state of partial paranoia. It doesn’t mean that you are necessarily sad, or something is wrong. It can be a consequence of preoccupation of mind in too many areas, anxiety, curiosity, daydreaming, insomnia, overwhelming, excess of happiness and whatnot.

As on vacations, I have applied for internships in different offices and got an interview call from most of them with a very handsome monthly stipend. However, I was not ready for an internship this month so I left the interview calls unattended just to make a decision for my heart once in a while. I have been carrying out the instructions of my parents, teachers, and elders regarding either to do something or not. I went against my heart many times, yet I believe that right now if I can make a choice for myself, why not avail this chance? I am waiting for a much worthy internship right now that will start in August but that means I am free for 15 days again. Right after that, a thought of “university is going to get open soon” comes to my mind which is literally enough to ruin my whole day 😀 Simultaneously, there is a charity school in my vicinity where I teach as a volunteer, I am continuously thinking about joining that school again as well. Also, I am waiting for my driver to arrive so that I can join a very famous media group for my internship as it has already been finalized, just the paperwork is to be done. At the same time, I want to wake up all night watching my favorite series and rise late in the morning. However, I am also worried and guilty that I haven’t submitted my writings to any of the magazines this weekend. I am also worried because I have to go for antiques shopping for my room decor but nobody is up for driving me there. See? How many things are on my mind at the moment? I tried to come up with something really positive for you guys tonight but this is all I came up with. I am sleep deprived and I feel like a drunkard at the moment 😀

Guys, enjoy your life! Be your own boss and live your life in the way YOU WANT and not how OTHERS ARE LIVING. Every day, I see people uploading stories with a very bragging caption of “Internship Diaries” and “Office Work”, but it didn’t make any difference in my life. I can also feel envious and start looking out for internships again, but I won’t. Instead, I feel happy cuddling up with my kittens while others are enjoying their internships, and when my time will come, I will start working while they might be pampering themselves in some spa. Similarly, it might be better for you to bake a bunch of chocolate chip cookies and munch on your grizzly couch while watching Netflix. “Stranger Things” is a very good season just by the way 😀 See, we all are different and so are our needs and lifestyle. We need to accept ourselves in our own way and not in somebody else’s way. If you feel like doing so, Do it! However, if your heart is least interested, Forget it! It’s better to let go sometimes, for the good!

If today is a good day, be thankful and act humble, and if it is not, make yourself believe that tomorrow will be better than today. Every day is a new start and with every new day, we shine brighter than yesterday. All we have to do is believe in ourself and build our own personality. Most of us spend more than half of our life as somebody else’s. While we are busy comparing our lives with that of others, we usually forget that we should be working on creating our own journey, spending our lives just the way we want and feel comfortable in. We forget that we all should have our own personal space, our own identity, our own aura and most importantly our own self. Let’s get depressed everybody because Kylie just uploaded a new IG post where she is spending a spectacular summertime on the island. I think I should end my life because I can’t even afford a coconut on my own right now whilst she has thousands of customized coconuts, each with “Kylie Skin” written on it. I can’t afford to buy a pink and a white pillow while Kylie’s daughter Stormi is snuggling and drooling all the time in a huge pink and white private jet 😀 See, I adore them so much and I think they have a complete right to cherish the most out of what they have and what they can afford. My favorite Youtubers are buying Baja Blast every morning while I can’t even afford to buy a mountain dew 😀 I think I am done with my life haha 😀 See, writing this blog has already made me feel happy and joyful. This is it! Let’s cherish what we can do, and what we can afford rather than always pushing yourself off-limits just to show the world that you are no less. I can make french fries right now because I have a lot of potatoes in the pantry right now. I don’t think Kylie can eat so many chips as me, because fitness duh! 😀 Take care boos. 🙂

Goodnight! 

xoxo <3